After reading Brian’s entry about his drive and Milda’s entry about time and life and such (“We never realize the small things in life until one day they’re missing or not there…”), I got into one of those life-is-so-short moods again.

I’ve had so many memorable times in my life… Times I would give anything to just go back and experience again, not changing a thing, but just really valuing the experience while it’s happening.

I feel like sometimes I hesitate to do things for whatever reason… but at times like tonight, I’m just like, “well, why not go and do things you want to do? why wait?” I mean, our days are literally numbered– we each have a certain number of days that we will live (“May you live all the days of your life.”). And no, I’m not saying our destinies are set in stone (“Screw destiny! Destiny’s just another word for inevitable. And nothing’s inevitable if you stand up, look it in the eye and say, ‘You’re evitable.’” – Winifred Burkle)… But rather, destiny already knows what we’re going to do with our lives. We have the power to choose, but fate knows what those choices will be.

“It’s not supposed to be like this.”
“It’s not supposed to be anything.”

Alright, step back… getting off-topic.

Anyway, now it all comes back to my somewhat-existentialist perspective… In the big picture, nothing really matters. We are born, we die, and one day the Earth will die too. The universe is as infinite as it is meaningless. And yet, at the personal scope of things, a few good friends of mine mean the world to me. To me, living isn’t meaningless because I have people in it who really give it meaning… people I connect with, people I laugh with, people I can sit and watch the stars with. You guys mean so much to me, and I love you all, I really do.

“The universe will expand, then it will collapse back on itself, then it will expand again. It will repeat this process forever. What you don’t know is that when the universe expands again, everything will be as it is now; whatever mistakes you make this time around, you will live through on your next pass. Every mistake you make, you will live through again and again, forever. So my advice to you is to get it right this time around, because this time is all you have.”
– K-PAX

Thanks for the memories, and g’night for now.

current mood: calm

current music: Louis Armstrong – What A Wonderful World